In Food City Match-Ups, we take a look at the pros and cons of eating in two cities (some we’ve never been to or have any intention of setting foot in) and pass judgment based on unresearched stereotypes and hunches. This week we break down, completely biased of course, the 2008 NBA Playoffs. First up, the Eastern Conference with the #3 seed Orlando Magic taking on the #6 Toronto Raptors.
vs. 
After the jump: “The Magic Kingdom” vs. T.O.!
ORLANDO:
(Right in the mouse balls!)
Reputation: Theme restaurants and family joints as far as the eye can see. Sure, the big mouse brings in some fancy, high falutin’ chefs, but for the most part those chefs set up shop, slap their name on some high concept destination place, then delegates authority to some trusted lieutenant. Then, usually after the check clears, they hightail it back home to a place that welcomes culture and eschews creepy planned “Stepford Towns.”
Local Flavor: Home to one of the largest Puerto Rican communities outside of Puerto Rico itself, I’m sure you could find some quality Arroz con Pollo somewhere. Also, the Colonialtown District (Seriously? They have a neighborhood that sounds like it belongs in a theme park? Wow…) is home to “Little Saigon“, which sounds like you could have a light lunch of Ban Mi sandwiches while you ponder if you want to hit Sea World or Universal Studios next. Other than that… maybe gator meat?
Top Restaurant: According to “starbucksbrew” on Chowhound.com, Midnight Blue and Blue Bistro with Chef Josephine Foster takes top honors for Orlando’s top place to eat. So… take it with a grain of salt. At least it sounds like he/she/it has actually been to Orlando.
The Signature Dish: Twisted Mac, Chicken, and Cheese. A grilled chicken breast tops off twisted Cavatappi pasta tossed in a lightly spiced three cheese sauce, with garlic, roasted red peppers, and Romano parsley bread crumbs. Served with a side of garlic toast. And you can totally eat while seated under Krist Novoselic’s busted Fender bass at the Hard Rock Cafe in Orlando!
What Are They Eating in the Locker Room?: The Magic have Carlos Arroyo on their roster, possibly the best basketball player Puerto Rico has ever produced. So ask Carlos about those Borricuan places to eat we mentioned earlier. But they also have Hedo Turkoglu, the pride of Istanbul, Turkey. So I’m guessing they could have some Kofte, Doner Kebob, and Moussaka to nosh on.
What The Locals Say: (Art, Florida native and bartender at my restaurant responding to the question: “Is there more than just theme restaurants and Disney stuff in Orlando?”) “Nope, that’s pretty much it. But name a themed place and I promise you it’s in Orlando.”
TORONTO:
(Any excuse to say “Hoser” is acceptable)
Reputation: Cold. But a clean, friendly, polite, incredibly diverse and cosmopolitan city. Its the largest city in Canada, and its cultural capital, so much of the “Best of Canada” can usually be found here. Oh yeah, and the beer doesn’t suck here, hosers.
Local Flavor: The ethnic neighborhoods tell the tale. Being a part of the British Empire (sort of), fish and chips and curries are pretty common. The Portuguese have little hole-in-wall places all over, as do the Thai, the Chinese, and the Greeks (because as long as there is food on this Earth, the Chinese and Greeks will be selling it). Harvey’s is Canada’s version of In n’ Out. And if you want a Dunkin’ Donuts, Canadian Style, look for Tim Horton’s. Also, I bet if you ask someone really nice, you could probably get your hands on some walrus blubber from up north or something.
Top Restaurant: Jamie Kennedy Wine Bar. According to Toronto Life Magazine, this place represents everything that’s “fresh, local, and seasonal” (the foodie’s mantra) and has a world class wine selection to boot. And no, it’s not THAT Jamie Kennedy.
Signature Dish: Maybe it’s a good thing there isn’t one. The aforementioned “British Empire” effect is strong here when you realize Toronto cuisine is mostly ethnic cuisine. So maybe a nice Roti? Or if you stretch Toronto’s sphere of influence to include ALL of Canada (and the Raptors are Canada’s only team) you could throw in Montreal’s heart-stoppingly (literally) awesome poutine. Just take french fries, cheese curds, and cover the whole thing in a thick brown chicken gravy. And voila… poutine!
What Are They Eating in the Locker Room?: Talk about international, they have players from Slovenia, Italy, and Argentina. But they have two players from Spain (Jose Calderon and Jorge Garbajosa), so maybe we can assume they’ve had some Paella from time to time.
What the Locals Say: Amy is from Mississauga, ON. I knew her from college where she studied Food and Beverage in the Hotel College She writes in on Toronto’s food scene via myspace: “Vancouver and Montreal are a little more exciting for restaurants, but the best thing about eating in Toronto isn’t the fancy restaurants or what the hot new place is, but the tiny little storefront places you find just walking around.”
And the verdict is…
Was there any doubt? Toronto. And this one was a slaughter. They had me at “Beer”.
Is it fair to pit an entire nation against a city that wasn’t even a major city until very recently? Well, let me put it to you this way: Was it fair to let Florida decide the 2000 election? So I say, eat a dick Florida. Thanks for a shitty economy, a quagmire in Iraq, and a horrifying eight years. I’ll be carrying a grudge about this forever.
Sorry to let the competition get away from the food. We’ll be a little more even handed next time.
Next up: Cleveland vs. Washington DC. Stay Tuned!
